


Bad For Me

by sau_d_ad_e



Category: Eddsworld - All Media Types
Genre: Hinted tomedd, Im really bad at writing, M/M, Matt is head over heels for Tom, Tom is sad, edd is sad, fuck tomtord, gay?, i sorta plan for this to be angsty as some point, idk ill update tags as i go, umm friends to lovers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-23
Updated: 2017-09-01
Packaged: 2018-12-19 01:59:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11887533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sau_d_ad_e/pseuds/sau_d_ad_e
Summary: Matt is so in love with Tom..





	1. Weak

Weak. 

Weak is the first word that Matt could use to describe how he felt around Tom. It wasn't a bad weak, no quite the opposite. It was the kind of weak that causes your stomach to flip when that someone says your name. The kind of weak that makes your head spin with thoughts of them. The weak that makes it hard to breath, hard to breath, walk, talk, play it cool. 

Play it cool. Huh. 

Matt had trouble with that too. He would walk through the crowded halls of the school, making his way to Tom. When he would find the male standing with his friends. Talking lowly about something with Edd. Making fun of Tord. Saying hello to Matt.

Saying hello. Oh!

"H-hey!" Matt's cheeks were no doubt flushed red with embarrassment due to being caught so off guard. It wasn't anything else, not at all. He wouldn't have been so off guard if his head wasn't so overwhelmed with thoughts of Tom. It wasn't unusual. No. Matt thought about Tom quite a bit. When he would sit in class, doodling him in his notebook. Writing his name in cursive before erasing it. Laying in bed at night. Matt thought about Tom a lot. More than a friend would. And it was a bit much for him. 

"Me 'nd Edd are seeing a movie after school, want to come?" Tom spoke with such an easy tone, as if he didn't care about what he said. Matt shuffled in his spot in front of Tom, trying his best to not stare into the inky pools of black that were his eyes. With a shrug Matt said "Sure." 

His excitement was overflowing inside him, though it would be seen as stupid if he let it show outside. So excited to see a movie with his friends. They did that a lot. But time with Tom meant was too much to Matt to not be excited. He gave a small smile. 

Deciding to walk to class before it started was a good decision. It gave Matt time to cool off and think about what might happen later. He mostly thought about Tom, not paying attention to the fact that Edd would be joining them. Matt decided that he would offer to take them all out for a snack after. And then it was back to thinking. He thought about Tom and him sharing popcorn. Tom putting his arm around Matt. He thought about them holding hands and smiling as they walked out of the theater. He thought of them sharing a sweet kiss as they said goodni- 

The bell. Matt hadn't realized the bell signaling the end of the class. It wasn't unusual of him to think of Tom for the entire class. It wasn't unusual to be excited to hang out with your best friend. That's normal. Matt was happy to think about his friend, but was upset to know that, what he thought of was not things that friends would do. Matt walked out of the class room, heading out for lunch. 

The rest of Matt's day went by quickly. He was too caught up in his thoughts to pay much attention. Despite him being so occupied, he was a good student, though he never knew much off the top of his head. Matt walked to find Tom. Tom and Edd. Both of them. He continued to walk until he found his friends. The boys standing by the exit door and waiting. They all walked together, making happy conversation. They made their way to a shop, buying snacks to bring into the movie with them, as to not have to pay for the overpriced food at the theater. 

"What are we seeing?" Matt asked curiously. Edd spoke. "A new comedy! Heard online it was pretty funny so I suggested we see it. So glad you came along!" Edd smiled big, and Matt returned the smile. "Thank you!" 

Before Matt realized they were at the Theater and in line to grab their ticket. Matt made sure that when they were sitting he was next to Tom, happy to have the feel of their shoulders brushing together. Matt pulled a box of candy out of his backpack, taking one out of the box and popping it in his mouth, it was sweet, making him smile. 

The movie was good. There were many laughs. Matt was too busy focusing on the presence beside him too remember too much about it. They stood to exit the theater, walking out and throwing away empty candy boxes and wrappers as they passed the garbage. "Would you guys want to go out to get something to eat? I will pay of course! As thanks for letting me tag along, but I mean, how could you not want me to come." He grinned at the other two boys, getting a laugh out of them. Being vain was a joke to them, and he was happy to make Tom laugh. They agreed to food and all made their way to a place to eat.

Matt ate carefully, careful to not make a mess, careful to not make a fool of himself in front of Tom. He couldn't believe the sun was starting to set. He thought about watching the sunset with Tom. The two of them together in the park. Holding hands as the sun dipped below the horizon. The sky turning to soft oranges and pinks. He liked that thought. 

Dinner went by smoothly. Edd had called his mom to pick him up as he was getting tired of walking. Tom however was still up and happy, and if Tom was happy, Matt was happy. Matt and Tom walked together. Toward the street the boys lived on. The sky was the beautiful colours that Matt had thought of before. Tom walked backward, talking about nothing in particular. Matt liked listening to Tom talking. Tom was creative, thinking that he would do well at plays or tv shows. Maybe an author, though Tom had said many times that he wasn't interested in books. 

They walked up on the houses they knew so well, the sun now below the horizon. Tom's house was first in their path. The boys stood outside, talking. Matt was upset to know that soon he would be away from Tom for the night. He made a mental note to invite Tom over for the weekend. 

"It was nice hanging out with you today, Matt." Matt smiled at the sentence. "Well of course it was. But really, thank you. I'd love to do it again sometime." He hummed softly as he finished the sentence. Matt thought that sounded too cheesy, but it made Tom smile. "See ya later Matt." And like that Tom was walking into his house. Matt went to his. 

Weak is the first word that Matt could use to describe how he felt around Tom. It wasn't a bad weak, no quite the opposite. It was the kind of weak that causes your stomach to flip when Tom says his name. The kind of weak that makes his head spin with thoughts of Tom. The weak that makes it hard to breath, hard to breath, walk, talk, play it cool. 

And yeah. With Tom, it was always hard to play it cool.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First chapter done!!


	2. Fools

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tommy boy has got it bad.

A fool.

A fool is what anyone would have to be to fall for Matt. The way that Matt acted made it hard for people not to roll their eyes at him. The way he was so narcissistic, or the way he would check himself out in the mirrors and windows. Matt only cared about himself. And that made it hard to take him seriously. Anybody would be a fool to fall in love with Matt, and Tom guessed that he was a fool then. 

And Tom was okay with being a fool. 

Okay with being a fool as long as it kept him close to Matt. Matt was a big part of Tom's life recently. Occupying his thoughts a bit more than usual. Tom liked Matt as much as Matt liked himself. And Tom liked himself much less than he liked Matt, in fact, Tom barely liked himself. His crush on Matt was a bit embarrassing to him. He never had told anyone about it.

Never told anyone? C'mon man don't lie. 

Okay. Tom told one person. The one person who he was closest too other than Matt. No not Tord. For all Tom cared Tord could die in a ditch.Despite what parents, students, and teachers though about Tom and Tord being good friends, they were nowhere near that. 

Right, who he told. 

Edd. Tom had told Edd. Tom trusted Edd. Edd trusted Tom...Sort of. It wasn't a sort of in the way that Tom blabbed his mouth sometimes. No. It was the sort of that Tom was mentally unstable and got overwhelmed and felt a lot of pressure easily. But that was okay because Edd understood. 

Initially Edd laughed, asking Tom if he was serious. The panic in Tom's face had told Edd that Tom was dead serious. Tom was never one to get so panicked and scared over crushes or love. Not usually. When they would usually talk about these things it would go down like: 'Hey, guess what, Sam has a crush on me.' 'You gonna go for her?' 'Nah. Not my type.'

Tom had turned down a lot of girls. They were mostly the kind you would find hanging out with the "douchey gangsters" in the school. Edd just thought that when Tom had said they weren't his type that meant he was looking for the right girl, a nice girl. Tom had always said he wasn't gay, so of course it was a surprise to Edd when this new information was handed over. 

"You can't tell him. You have to promise not to." Is all that Tom said. And Edd swore up and down that he wouldn't tell a soul. And he didn't. Because he wanted to be good for Tom. He wanted to be Tom's support. Edd couldn't tell anyone. Edd also couldn't tell Tom that he was hurt. He couldn't tell Tom that he wanted Tom more than Matt ever would. But Edd never did anything. 

He wanted to be good for Tom. 

When Matt had joined them all for the movie Tom was ecstatic. He couldn't help but give smiles when he saw that Matt was having a good time. Matt looked so cute when he was happy. A lot of the times when there was silence as they were walking to the theater that day Tom was busy thinking. Thinking of possibilities. Putting his arm around Matt while the movie was running. Their hands touching while reaching for popcorn. Wow cheesy. Them walking out together after and going home. Kissing at the door. It was dumb. 

Tom was dumb. 

He thought he was dumb. He really wasn't. Anyone would say so if he had told him about his thoughts. He wanted to do nice things for Matt, and that wasn't dumb. But in Tom's mind it was. It was dumb because he knew he was a bad person. Tom knew he was bad and that he didn't deserve to be happy with Matt. 

Tom didn't like thinking about that part. The part that he was bad. So he would start talking. 

It's hard to talk in a movie theater. So he didn't. He sat watching the movie, sneaking peeks at Matt who was sitting next to him. The way that Matt smiled when he would eat something sweet was cute. Matt would sometimes eat popcorn and a sweet at the same time. It confused Tom, but he found the quirk endearing. 

Tom enjoyed the movie. It was okay. It would have been better probably if he hadn't focused so much on Matt. Tom did get a few laughs out of it though. Tom brushed some loose popcorn off of his lap as he stood, adjusting his hoodie and stuffing his cookie wrappers into the pocket. They all exited and threw out their trash. Tom made a joke about getting in the bin as well, lifting his foot and shoving it into the slot. 

He made Matt laugh. 

When Matt suggested dinner Tom got nervous. He didn't want to make a fool of himself while eating. Or order something that the others found gross. Thankfully he didn't. Dinner was really fun as well! They all joked and ate and enjoyed their time together. At one point Tom had noticed Matt looking out the window at the setting sun. Tom thought it was beautiful. He wanted to watch the sunset with Matt someday. Go to some clearing in the woods or a hall, lay close together and watching the day fade to night. He liked that thought. 

Dinner wasn't as bad as Tom had thought it would be. Edd had gotten a ride from his mother, and while she offered to drive the other two boys home as well Tom declined, wanted to spend the rest of the night alone with Matt. He was glad that Matt also decided to walk with them. And so their walk home began. Tom had turned on his heel, walking backward. They talked about anything that came to mind, and Tom got embarrassed a few times when he had almost fell over or bumped into something. He didn't stop walking backward though. No. He wanted to see Matt's face. 

In this light it was beautiful, but it always was.

Tom talked a lot more than Matt, and while he felt nervous about it Matt had always insisted that it was okay and that Matt liked to listen. Tom would laugh whenever Matt brought up that Tom should write books. It was too much work Tom would think. Not that he guessed, but it was just too much of a hassle to get books published. But he wasn't sure. He didn't know the future. 

He hoped that whatever the future was, it involved Matt.

When they got up onto their street their conversation began to die down, knowing that they would have to part. The sun was down by now, the stars starting to come out. Tom liked seeing how they shined in Matt's big eyes. They got to Tom's door before he even noticed, so they chatted for some time.

"It was nice hanging out with you today, Matt." Tom felt silly saying that. But it was true. It was nice hanging out with Matt. It always was. Even though Tom would never admit that. When Matt had said that he would love to do it again Tom's heart fluttered. He couldn't believe that, but he hoped it was true. He hoped that Matt wanted to spend more time with Tom. 

And that was that as Tom went inside and to his room. He watched from his window as Matt walked down the street to his own house, a cheesy smile on both of their faces. Wow, Tom had it bad, but he didn't mind. 

A fool.

A fool is what anyone would have to be to fall for Matt. The way that Matt acted made it hard for people not to roll their eyes at him. The way he was so narcissistic, or the way he would check himself out in the mirrors and windows. Matt only cared about himself. And that made it hard to take him seriously. Anybody would be a fool to fall in love with Matt, and Tom guessed that he was a fool then.

And Tom was okay with being a fool.


End file.
